Amazon Screws Up – Again

This time it’s not wholly their fault, but it did put a damper on thanksgiving. I got a King Kooker as I had posted about before. The King Kooker is nice and it puts out a stupid amount of heat. Heating four gallons of oil takes only a half hour or so and this is running it conservatively. By my guessdimate I could turn it up to jet-engine epic proportions and heat the oil in half the time but there’s a very real possibility of both boiling and burning the oil. Both of these situaitons are bad.

Anyway, King Kooker also lets you buy their accessories. I wasn’t really interested in the entire lobster steaming kit, but I was interested in a fry-basket. The turkey fryer only comes with the turkey tree and it’s priced about the same. The fry basket lets you do boils and… frying things which don’t fit on the turkey tree. Like potatoes. So it’s pretty important. I got mine from UPS last night and of course it showed up and looked like the truck ran over it. Protip – it’s pretty impressive you can crush a metal drum in shipping and not notice it. Anyway, Amazon’s return policy is that if you return an item before the price changes, you can get an exchange. If the price changes (and if you know about Amazon, this happens daily) then you have to take a refund of whatever amount you paid. The nice part – they do UPS pickups. I don’t have to pay to return it. Sadly I’m out the fry basket this thanksgiving but something tells me with this many people coming it won’t matter.

Turkey Fryer

For my birthday and Christmas, people usually give me gift cards to either Cabelas or Northern Brewer. In the spirit of “people have to come to my house because I’ve got a baby”, I bought a turkey fryer with the gift cards this year. I ended up paying only $22 (I had the oil and needed to get propane anyway). But, oh god, the turkey was good. Last night we had a test run of the thing to see how well we did and my folks brought over a turkey. If you’re wondering, it’s a King Kooker. Not the huge one, but the smaller one up to 18lbs turkeys. Reason being that most turkeys at the store are less than 16 lbs so there’s quite a bit of extra room.

The process is dead simple – thaw turkey, bring heat up to 350F, toss turkey in, cook for 3.5 minutes per pound. This actually results in the bird being slightly overdone, so if you want less crispy turkey, knock off a few minutes.

King Kooker also has the Right Stuff for BTUs (plenty) and their kits all have parts you can buy online. So the turkey fryer kit can convert to the steamer kit and can convert to the fry basket kit all by purchasing all their optional accessories. But the most importantly the burner puts out 60k BTUs and the stand will accept my brew pot for boiling beer.

And the turkeys?

This was the first time we’ve ever had turkey in my family and there weren’t a ton of leftovers no-one wanted to eat in the fridge.