Maynard James Keenan and the Great Grape Gonspiracy

I mentioned Blood into Wine the other day – I decided to buy it having gotten one positive comment from someone and one e-mail telling me my comments didn’t work and I should kill myself and it happens to be decent.

I also would like to plug Caduceus. I’ve been sitting here far longer than I should at work paging through it (I’m up to 07/28/06) and having a blast reading it. The intro to the site is deceptive, wait until you see the vine come up onto the trellis and click on the book. Start from the beging. Click on the photos. Maynard is one of the people I would love to meet in real life. Yeah it’s a great artist and all that but he understands the purpose of The Great Work (emphasis on the last word) for what it takes to actually invest yourself in something. More on the point he’s got a wonderful sense of balance of nature to his vineyards. Some of them are graded, some of them are on the side of a hill, and when they found a mystery grape vine, they kept it. That grape vine has seen two world wars, the prohibition, “hippies and smelters” and now it’s his.

Reading this type of thing I tend to feel like I’m missing out on life by not owning a vineyard, but I suppose there’s perks to having more money than god. For one, Maynards tasting notes from literally around the world are interesting to read, if not terribly brief. But on the other hand he doesn’t come off being a wine snob. It’s something he’s interested in doing. To quote the journal, what other rock star owns a backhoe? Or what other rockstar has a subaru brat which has seen some real amature welding. Lord only knows.

My grandparents had grape vines growing around back, but I never remembered the taste. Not sure if they ever produced anything workable, certainly I don’t ever remember eating them. I do remember their back yard in the valley house being a total wash for the most part. I do plan on trying to grow grapes here, I think it would dovetail nicely into the beer brewing and the honeymead. If the cross pollonation happens the way Maynard suggests with growing fruit near the grapes, then the grapes grown in the backyard should be fantastic if we can keep the apple, pear and nectarine trees alive.

Anyway, if I’m ever in Arizona, I figure I’ll show up with my purple postal carriers hat and a shovel and see if he could use the help or if I’ll just become another paintball target.

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