I’ve had a flash of inspiration

I’ve decided I want to go into politics.

I knew a guy, way back when, you’re talking 20 years since I’ve even heard of him, who lived on the block behind my parents. He was otherwise unremarkable aside of being a total asshole. He was adopted, and his parents promptly put him on ritalin. For whatever reason his parents and my parents were decent friends and so they put us together. We never were friendly, but my parents and his parents stayed friends. The other day I found out his father went into politics for the township. I’ve decided it can’t be that hard then!

My policy is pretty simple:
Victimless crimes as we have them today can only be tacked onto victimful offenses. Speeding goes away – no more speeding tickets unless it causes an accident involving you. Drugs? Those laws go away also, unless you happen to test positive for them while beating your wife. Trespass is a gray area, but I feel it’s the only real victimless crime I would keep as a primary offense. This fits in the idea of ‘real property’ being an extension of the person, because I’ve decided to prosecute for trespass, this also means no more random sobriety checks, drug searches, or anything of the sort. Your car is your person and your person is your person under the idea of ‘real property’.

Probation rules still apply, if you’re on probation nothing’s going to change, but this is fair because to end up on probation you need to already be “in the system”, and to get there someone would have to violate these new concepts of law I’m putting forward.

I’m also getting rid of the Pennsylvania Liquor Control Board, legalizing hunting on Sundays, and deregulating firearms in my state – ATF be damned. You can have any gun you want, and use it any way you want so long as you don’t damage another person. Keep in mind everyone else will be armed just as nicely.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s